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Monday, October 15, 2018

How I Became an Anarchist

How I became an Anarchist
Erica Crooks

Any anarchist has their story of how they became an anarchist I most certainly think.
My story is similar to me coming out from Androgyne to a non-binary transgender lesbian woman or even understanding that I’m a Twin Flame and a Lightworker , even having the INFP personality type. The similarity being when I had a definition that relates to my situation.
Anyone can discribe their situation , the problem is when information seem scarce .
The thing about me and my life is that a little over 10 years ago , I was trying to search for answers and I couldn’t find them. I even got in trouble on message forums while coming out because I was just sick and tired of the “ don’t label yourself with identity politics “ situation.
I wanted to learn , I wanted to learn about me and why I was different.
Since high school I came to the realization that I’m different from most people around me and I would rather be the nonconforming social outcast then feeling suicidal pretending to be someone I was not out of fear.

How I became an Anarchist is no different than my other stories of self discovery.
But before I even knew the proper definition of what Anarchism was ,
I was already a Satirist . And the political ideology of Anarchism speaks to my heart and soul and hopefully to most satirists.

It was late 2016 when Donald Trump got elected , I was white as a ghost. I know I’m pale skinned but what I mean was I was in a state of shock. I thought this was a joke.
I just felt this intuitive vibration of grey colored silence .
With the thought of “ WE ARE DOOMED ! “

At the time I was trying to get clarity of my Twin Flame Running from me.
Even my Twin Flame thought that the Trump election was terrible as she told me at a Pride Holiday Party that year.
I knew most of the LGBTQ+ people there were silently pissed off and would make snarky remarks when they could from “ I don’t want to Trump it . “ to “ Well our organization ain’t no Trump Tower. “
But there was also the other side that wanted to not even think about it.

In 2017 ,  my neighborhood was getting worse and I think it has relation to something I’ve read somewhere which is when you’ve got spiritual gifts and abilities , if your a Twin Flame / Lightworker / Empath , your a magnet to dark entities on Earth and the spirit realm.
Which explains “ Energetic Vampires “ ( aka sociopaths , psychopaths , narcissists , dark triad , etc. )
Everyone wants to be happy , healthy , prosperous and free. But there are some mentally ill toxic personality disorders that don’t trust love , so they are going to befriend you and take advantage of you anyway they can.

In my neighborhood , people with addiction problems started moving in. Especially my building. And they were involved in illegal activity to put it mildly. 
And as the ONLY Transgender Woman and Lesbian in the neighborhood ,
I was automatically the target to be taken advantage of.
Fortunately I do have one family member who’s got my back which is my mother. 
And she started to get harassed as well.
These neighbors frightened her more than me because I told her
I already had my life threatened by sociopaths pretending to be my friends and my father and his wife , these bigoted idiots mean nothing to me. 
But still they did to creepy crap to me from trying to urinate on me from a distance to even having this 30 something year old girl trying to friend me and even trying to women seduce me which I’m so loyal to my Twin Flame , I’m not that easy to turn on like that.

So much material for satire and new characters as usual. lol :P

Anyway in 2017 , my mom thought that the whole neighborhood was being taken over by one guy who kind of looks like Curly from The Three Stooges except as a diabetic who fakes needing to be in a wheel chair wearing Elmo Pajama Bottoms.

And the landlords never threw out any of these people or even mentioned to know if they knew something big was going around.

I kind of knew back in 2013 so it developed overtime. For me , I like a nice quiet apartment and screw whatever is happening outside my life just as long as no one is threatening me.

My mother thought that I should get a restraining order on this creep. 
I have never been in a court before.
But this judge was transphobic and I was SO PISSED OFF , 
The judge could have done anything he wanted to me.
The judge was surrounded by women half his age and perhaps they had sympathy for my situation.
That’s usually the case for LGBTQ+ I think.
Cisgender heterosexual women tend to be more on our side then cisgender heterosexual men , especially those in some position of power.

In early 2018 , I went to a neurologist who was just as had as the judge. Pretty much the same
personality type as my father , STJ .
And usually I’m nice and cool and friendly and polite to people , but these kinds of people ,
if they get on my nerves and start denying that I’m a woman , I can be one hell of a Social Justice Warrior let me tell you.
I’m all Activist mode baby , probably relating my 1960s past lives or something.
Again a suggestion from my mother which I disagreed.
But I did discover the sick dark truth about the Neurology test , DSM , and The American Psychos Association.
If you are not a cisgender heterosexual SJ personality type / stereotype ,
you were going to get diagnose with something.

10 years ago I thought the reason why I was different was because of being diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome / Add Adhd / PTSD / and the list goes on.
I disagree with all of them. I don’t harm people. I just speak my mind and I listen to people , even this jerk. 
It was pretty funny that this guy was a Christian with a fish pin on his doctor coat.
I wonder what his diagnoses is. lol
Don’t get me wrong , I respect peoples religions just as long as they aren’t bigoted idiots.
Maybe that’s the liberal side of me.
I’m into New Age / New Thought Spirituality myself and ties into having a Twin Flame.

With all of this and kind of figuring out that Obama’s pro LGBTQ laws didn’t help educate the bigoted and ignorant . I started to question what my political ideology was.
I knew I was left wing. As well as the satirists I’m influenced by.

So before I thought I was a social liberal / libertarian leftists .

Then I got curious about what Anarchism is because of the fact that
“ Government doesn’t do anything so why do we even need it. Satirists go after those in power , maybe we don’t need those kinds of people. “

So I read a little bit about Anarchist and just like everything I find describes who I am and how I think , I became an overnight Anarchist reading addict. lol
This stuff is SO GOOD , and I was getting a good education.

And here I was in 2016 feeling kind of lost as a satirist because I pretty much said everything.
But it was like I was spiritually guided to all of this.
And also perhaps helped me shine a little bit of light upon psychopaths , sociopaths , narcissists , dark triad , etc. 

Libertarian Socialist Anarchism , especially the Anarchist FAQ 
dispelled the myths that bad people are bad Just because they are.
It explained that we live in a Land of Confusion ( Just like the Genesis / Spitting Image music video from 1986 ) .
It explained a lot of things , including why I struggled in small business.

If there’s some sort of life mission for me in my life , it’s to remind like minded people that

For me , I was and barely socializing with people , it was all thanks to like minded people on the internet to help me with the knowledge I have today which I was trying to find answers to since 2007.
Perhaps spirit is helping me too.
Hey , I did find my Twin Flame face to face on Earth. It’s just all about coming to Twin Flame Union now. The Twin Flame Mirror feels kind of like an Rubik’s Cube , I’m still working on figuring it all out. 

It's kind of similar to that whole “ When Jesus Christ saved my life and I just wanted to tell the world “ thing , expect it’s kind of smarter.
Speaking of Christianity , there is Anarcho-Christianity and Anarcho-Religious.
I’ve meet some cool intuitive that were Christian.
I sort of identified as one rather loosely but the whole scare tactic and anti-LGBTQ+ hate got me turned off.

In conclusion , I would consider myself to be several anarchists and still open minded to whatever Anarchist Schools of Thought I can find.
Libertarian Socialist Anarchist
Anarcho Pacifism
Trans Anarchist / Queer Anarchist  / Anarcho Feminism
Anarcho Transhumanism 
Cultural Anarchist
Left Social Anarchism basically

Funny how I first got into Anarchist through Anarcho-Capitalism but that was just months.
Also I do feel kind of bad for past sketches from The Erica Crooks Show in 2015 mocking Anonymous as being crap trolls online who live in their mother's basement and also the ending to The Ask Dr LeBrick Halloween Special , but I kind of look at it kind of like how Rik Mayall played Rick the Anarchist in The Young Ones.
The Young Ones was about 4 of the typical leftists stereotypes ( The Anarchist , The Punk , The Hippy and The 1970s style cool formal Playboy ) , however all 4 of them are wannabes and they are ignorant of what they stand for. Perhaps that’s how I can look back at mistakes in my work. It’s just the ignorance of the character while my future work can just correct that.

_ Erica

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